Why Can't We Be Friends?

"That's what I thought, too," he said at last, "when I was your age. If there's just one kind of folks, why can't they get along with each other? If they're all alike, why do they go out of their way to despise each other? Scout, I think I'm beginning to understand something. I think I'm beginning to understand why Boo Radley's stayed shut up in the house all this time... it's because he wants to stay inside." (Lee, 23.117) 

It’s easy to make a joke about the French being rude. It’s harder to walk around in their shoes for a while. I got to walk around their country for a good while, and even though I didn’t pick up any French shoes, I feel like I’ve walked in them, at least to a minimal degree. France’s history has been one of war. Bloodshed and war. Occupation and war. Famine and war (Ever wonder where escargot came from?). The whole world at war. In France. Twice. If the whole world made a battleground out of my country (twice), I’d be hesitant to welcome strangers as well. 

I learned that the French are very much willing to help someone who’s lost on the street. They are amazingly kind in that respect. However, when a blundering, obese American stumbles around speaking English more loudly than anyone would prefer, taking pictures of some building that’s only 500 years old, and butchering the pronunciation of Le Tour Eiffel, there’s not much incentive to extend a warm welcome. Hence the cold shoulder. Most Parisians would switch to English (which they speak quite well, actually) at the first sign of my linguistic troubles because they’ve found it to be much more convenient. I can hardly blame them. It was quite practical. 

All in all, I find that the French aren’t rude, they’re just cautious. No one particularly likes the overtly loud, obnoxious, oblivious cousin at the family reunion. And that’s what Americans become when in Europe. Placed next to the rich, sophisticated, cultured, fashionable relative that is France, it’s no wonder France avoids eye contact for as long as possible. Perhaps it’s time to see that they’re not rude, we’re just annoying.